I have been struggling a lot lately with my mind. I have let too much of the stress get to me. I keep thinking that my fiancee has changed his mind about marrying me. I know it is all in my head but I can't help it. I had thought at one point that I was in a happy marriage. That marriage ended badly.
I'm ready to plan my wedding there just isn't much we can do right now. We have had some setbacks that have put the wedding off. My son is pushing for the wedding to happen now. He thinks we will get married without him. I'm worried that someone has told him that I don't want him there.
I can't get married without him. He is the most important person to me. I love him so very much.
I fear that I will let him down. That I'm not a good mother. My ex-husband told me that I am a bad mom. He told me that I don't do anything for my son. I try to give everything to my kid. I take him to do things I know he loves. I made sure he had a room he would love to be in.
My ex won't let me have anything to do with my son's schooling. I never know what is going on. I feel like I am missing out on so much. I never wanted to not be there every single day. Life is so different from what i thought it would be.
